YOUNGSVILLE, LA – With tropical storm Barry dumping rain on the area all weekend, residents of the already flood-prone area of Youngsville have reportedly abandoned the idea of worshiping a God in favor of giving all of their devotion to Aquaman.
The move comes on the back of many Youngsville streets taking on heavy water on a regular basis, and many folk believe that they will perhaps receive more luck in terms of flooding (or lack of) during future rainfall events if they dedicate their lives to the aquatic superhero.
“God doesn’t seem to be doing much to help us”, explained Youngsville homeowner Ceola Wells, “I go to church every Sunday, most times in a canoe. But every time we get a little bit of rain, we end up with three feet of water. Something had to change. We feel like nobody is hearing our pleas and our prayers.”
“Our local church has already removed the statue of Jesus Christ and replaced it with a life size model of Aquaman. Our whole community is in agreement that the word of Aquaman is now the way to go. We truly think that we will be blessed by him if we give him all of our love and devotion. I mean, put it this way; it can only be better than what we’re currently stuck with.”
“All praise to our underwater father!”
A service at the local Church of Our Aquatic Hero in Youngsville is scheduled to take place next Sunday. All are welcome to attend, especially those with flooding issues.
