LAFAYETTE, LA – It’s over. Garth’s hell is finally over. Reports are coming in this morning that, under the blanket of darkness, Garth Brooks made a daring midnight escape from the Cajundome last night after allegedly being held against his will for the past two weeks.
In a scene that wouldn’t look out of place in an episode of Prison Break, Brooks allegedly made his breakout by working out the exact time that the security guard on the North perimeter went for his daily evening smoke break. This gave him a 30 second window to leave his room.
The next step was to locate the only fire escape ladder in the building, that was used by the contractors who cleaned the roof a few months ago.
Once on the roof, he would slide down and into the back of a dump truck that just so happened to be filled with the thousands of discarded fake cowboy boots and cowboy hats that had been left behind by the capacity crowd. This meant for a soft landing.
The final part of the plan was easy – run. Run like hell across the parking lot and avoid the light and any attention at all costs.
It is not known at this point just where Brooks is. It is theorized that he donned shades and laid low at the Amtrak station downtown, before taking the Westbound train towards Houston.
If you do see him, you are urged to call the authorities at 1-800-GET-BRKS immediately.
