BATON ROUGE, LA – In an effort to combat the smell of ass produced from the Port Allen side of the Mississippi River, the EPA today gifted and installed a giant coconut tree air freshener to hang from the State Capitol building.
The ‘Little Trees’ air freshener, popular amongst most automobile drivers, was custom made especially for the project and stands at an impressive 180ft tall.
The new car scent has already started to take effect, with many drivers on the I-10 noticing an improvement in the smell as they entered Baton Rouge from the West. Of course, an improvement in smell wasn’t difficult as the only way was up.
The EPA did confirm that a 24-month contractual agreement had been signed, with a new Little Trees air freshener to be installed every three months with a new scent each time.
City spokesperson Michael Galligan explained that this was long overdue.
“It’s no secret that Port Barre has been smelling like the inside of a butthole for years now”, he said, “And with Baton Rouge so close and feeling the effects of said stench, the EPA has kindly agreed to gift us with an oversized air freshener to hang from the State Capitol – one every three months for two years.”
“The new car smell is nice but I think everyone is waiting for that black ice fragrance. But obviously we’re in no position to be picky. You could have laid out 5000 pieces of roadkill along the side of the I-10 and it would have been an improvement.”
“We’re hoping things improve straight away.”
Actually, it has recently been discovered that the smell was coming from INSIDE the Capitol building. `Get your facts straight!