NEW IBERIA, LA – Citing budget cuts, inflation and nobody in the area with enough fingers left to actually light fireworks, this year’s City of New Iberia 4th of July fireworks show was just three cake candles purchased at Walmart.
Onlookers watched this evening as the candles were lit and burned for approximately 25 minutes, before a stray gust of wind blew them out. The candles, which were purchased approximately 20 minutes before the show was scheduled to begin, cost $1.79 – wiping out 30% of the city’s annual budget.
However residents were happy with the display, mentioning how that they were happy with the lack of loud bangs this year – as they are never sure whether said bangs belong to a fireworks show or a local meth lab going up in flames.
The only sour note to the event was that the person who lit the candles did lose a finger in doing so. We have no idea how, however we will endeavor to find out the details, and if we can’t then we will just chalk it up to “New Iberia things”.
