BATON ROUGE, LA – Claiming that this is an absolutely sure-fire way to ensure that Louisiana achieves a 100% vaccination rate, Governor Edwards today launched the ‘Pothole For A Shot Hole’ initiative throughout the whole of the state.
The campaign, which goes into effect immediately, will ensure that one pothole will be filled in for every one person that receives one dose of a vaccine. He clarified that if someone were to receive a two-dose vaccine, then two potholes would be filled in.
“We are completely confident that this initiative will give everyone in Louisiana the boost to go out and get protected from COVID”, he said at todays press conference, “We considered a number of incentives to doing so – free beer, free food, hell we even considered free drugs. New Iberia was very excited about that. But the one we settled on was to fill in potholes.
Get vaccinated, and we will get a pothole filled in. It’s that simple. We’re no longer encouraging you to get vaccinated to protect friends and family, but to protect your car and your sanity.”
Governor Edwards also confirmed that vaccine recipients will be put into a lottery for a few lesser prizes.
“First-shot recipients will also go into a lottery, with the first prize being a one-week, all-expenses paid trip to Holly Beach. Second place will win a two-week stay. Commiserations already go out to them.
We’ll provide transportation, and if they refuse to get their second shot then we’ll leave them there. Everyone’s a winner.”