BATON ROUGE, LA – U.S. News’ annual ‘Best State To Live In Rankings‘ list is in, and in a complete shock to absolutely nobody, Louisiana has ranked dead last.

The survey, which measures things such as healthcare, education, economy, opportunity, infrastructure, crime, fiscal stability and quality of life saw Louisiana ranked among the lowest in all eight categories – only slightly above the levels given to Somalia, yet just below that of the Brazilian favelas.

Governor John Bel Edwards took to the podium this morning to give his opinion on the rankings, and he praised Louisiana for its “solid consistency”.

“If you look at all the other states in that list, they never know where they’re going to end up each year”, he said, “But we do. And that’s a testament to our solid consistency. Nobody likes surprises and we certainly don’t get any when it comes to state rankings.”

“I’d say that most states are envious of us. Anyone can be at the top, or fifth, or twenty fifth – but it takes a truly special state to always be the one propping up the other 49. We’re that special state. We’re the strongest state.”

“Please come and visit us sometime. Please.”


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