LAFAYETTE, LA – Verot School Road has been under construction for what seems like an eternity now. But there is now light at the end of the tunnel, as the first round of tests on the new Super Mario Kart track that is being constructed have officially begun.

Construction crews were removed for three hours this morning to allow the folks from the Super Mario series to conduct a number of test races along the track, known as Rain Breaux Road.

All tests were deemed a success, however there were a number of expected casualties throughout. In the first race, Yoshi was struck by a red shell and spun off the track and through the front window of Crawfish Time.

The second race saw Wario hit a stray banana peel and ended up side swiping an F150 that was turning in to Earl’s Cajun Market.

Later in the morning, Bowser was struck by a blue shell and, after being propelled 25 feet into the air, came crashing down onto Camelia Blvd causing thousands of dollars worth of damage in road repairs and devaluing River Ranch real estate by 15%.

But despite the carnage, the overall tests were deemed successful, and construction crews moved back into position to continue their work.

One often overlooked hero of the day was Lakitu, the helpful cloud-residing Koopa who places drivers back on the track. In fact he was appreciated so much that he was handed a 48-month contract to lift careless Lafayette drivers back onto roads across the whole of the city. He is expected to be kept busy and has been promised as much overtime as he needs.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here