LAFAYETTE, LA – Whooops – that’s not good! There was severe embarrassment in the ranks of the Cajun Heartland State Fair today, as it was realized that set-up crews for the event accidentally mixed-up a circular roller-coaster with the Stargate portal.

The Stargate – an Einstein–Rosen bridge portal device that allows quick transportation between two different locations – was turned on at around 10am this morning, which unfortunately saw seven children and three adults sucked into the apparatus and launched to another yet unknown planet.

An investigation into the incident is already underway.

“Yes we can confirm that there was a slight mix-up between two instruments today”, confirmed Lafayette Police Department spokesperson Troy Raleigh, “These numbnuts clearly can’t tell the difference between a top-secret government device and a white-knuckle roller-coaster. But I suppose that’s what you get when your sister is your wife and you’re paid in Skoal.”

“We are currently trying to locate a number of people who fell into the device. We are working closely with the U.S. Air Force and other government and scientific agencies to determine where exactly these people were sent to.”

“Early indications show that they may be on a planet called Hyvankyreen, which unfortunately is littered with man-eating 25-legged creatures that have 5-inch solid titanium armor. Not an ideal situation, although it is still a nicer prospect than ending up in Delcambre.”

“We will have more information when any is available.”

The search continues.


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