WASHINGTON, LA – In what was an embarrassing turn of events, the newly-elected congressman Clay Higgins was almost late to his swearing-in ceremony this week by not realizing that Washington, D.C. was his intended destination – not Washington, LA.

Earlier in the day he was overheard to have reassured his wife Becca that “we’ve got plenty of time to get there”, despite the swearing-in ceremony beginning in just over 18 hours time.

The couple allegedly arrived in Washington, LA an hour later.

“I thought it’d be a little more, y’know, busier than this”, Higgins was reported to have muttered. “Maybe we’re just early. At least that shows our enthusiasm.”

After an overnight stay in the quaint town, Higgins’ flip-phone was reported to have rang – the caller being event organizer Steve Thurwell.

“Hey Clay. You on your way buddy? Paul Ryan will be making his way out here later this morning. Wait, you’re where? Washington? So you’re here? WASHINGTON LOUISIANA?! That’s 30 minutes North of Lafayette! WE’RE IN WASHINGTON, DC YOU DOPEY FUCK! You’d better get that bible out and put pedal to the metal! God damn it Clay!”

Despite numerous speed infractions and his giant novelty cowboy hat being blown off of his Nissan Versa rental somewhere near Greensboro, NC, Clay and Becca did manage to make it to Washington, D.C. in the nick of time – however they were delayed again upon arrival after being informed that he had to leave his firearm in the car, much to his dismay.


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