LAFAYETTE, LA – The masts were hoisted, the anchors were raised and the decks were swabbed as the annual Bayou Vermilion Festival & Boat Parade took place on Sunday at Vermilionville Historic Village. The event, which essentially gives boaty people the chance to talk to other boaty people about boaty things whilst boating, is designed to bring awareness to the Bayou Vermilion and it’s uses for recreational boaty things.

And this year the event was bigger and better than ever, with a record number of people attending that saw enough boat traffic on the river to put the U.S. Navy on red alert. The event also attracted a number of high-profile celebrity sailors and boat enthusiasts that only added to the spectacle, including a rare appearance from Edward ‘Blackbeard’ Teach and the ghost of the Jolly Roger.

Teach explains that he was more than happy to accept the invitation.

“Yarrrr ’tis indeed a mighty honor to be here”, he said, “I was more than happy t’ come here and help brin’ awareness t’ a great cause! I brought me boys and me ship and we’re gon’t be sailing along with these other salty sea dogs to show these land-lubbers that th’ Bayou Vermilion is a great place to hoist sails, yarrr!”

Teach also stuck around to educate the younger generation on the art of mutiny, as well as showing them how to make someone walk the plank effectively, how to forcefully board and pillage enemy ships, and even gave them a Sword-fighting 101 class.

However things got a little rowdy towards the end of the day, with Teach engaging in a spot of navel warfare with a group of UL students in a rowing boat dressed as vikings. Cannon fire was reported, but the dispute was quickly settled, and both parties made amends and came together over a barrel of rum.

Other notable attendees included Popeye, Cap’n Crunch, Guybrush Threepwood, and Tom Hanks who was reprising the role of Captain Phillips.


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