CARENCRO, LA – After much discussions, many protests, and way too many town meetings, construction of the I-49 loop officially began today as expert engineers and crews from the Mattel-owned Hot Wheels Corporation moved-in to kick off proceedings.
The loop, which will see vehicles given the chance to basically be a Red Bull stunt driver for a few seconds, was designed by little 9-year old Jonny Sherman of Lafayette after being given a Hot Wheels track for Christmas – and now he finds himself as one of the Chief Engineers of the project.
“I can’t tell you how proud I am to see this go into place”, he said, “I spent most of Christmas mastering the physics and specifications of the loop in my bedroom, and now that it’s been perfected, we can begin. I have full confidence in all of the guys involved in this project. I know there’s been a lot of protest but this will be a good thing for Lafayette.”
And Jonny is confident that completion of the project will be both on-time and under-budget.
“Things are looking good”, he said, “As with all Louisiana construction projects we’ll obviously be cutting corners in certain places. Y’know, maybe just Gaffer Tape a few things here and there… use a hot glue gun instead of a soldering iron, that type of thing. But it’ll be ready for the Summer season, and I’m sure we’ll have cash to spare. The Capri Suns are on me!”