BATON ROUGE, LA – Louisiana governor John Bel Edwards finally came to his senses today, by declaring an official State of Emergency in light of Cajun Sno still being closed.
It’s been two weeks since the Lafayette-based sno-cone stand encountered a fire and had to be closed for refurbishment – and public desperation for a crack-infused icy treat in the middle of Winter is now reaching fever pitch.
“I’ve taken the decision to declare this state of emergency so that we can begin to take control of the situation before it really hits us all hard”, Governor Edwards said, “I realize that many of the people in Lafayette are tweaking for a stuffed sno-cone in February, and we’re going to bring in a number of personnel to make sure everything remains calm.”
He went on to say that those personnel would include both military and civil servants.
“We’re going to bring in a few ground troops to make sure that people don’t get crazy or anything”, he confirmed, “But we’re also bringing in counselors and such so that residents have somebody to talk to in these hard times. The last thing we want is our citizens turning to janky-ass, home made sno-cones that leave you feeling worse off because they taste like crap. There will be people there to help you.”
Governor Edwards confirmed that the state of emergency would take effect immediately, until Cajun Sno re-opens for business.
“We have no time to waste. We don’t want to see Lafayette go gown the Los Angeles 1992 route, or to be another Baltimore. Let’s nip this at the bud and keep things civil. The state is with you, Lafayette.”